Friday, August 7, 2009

An Open Letter from a Toddler at a Wedding

Dear Dearly Beloved,
I know that this whole wedding ceremony is supposed to be all quiet and peaceful and what not but I've got something to say. Obviously it's something that is very, very important because I am yelling it on a consistent basis. While I may not be able to string together real letters to form real words, I still have things on my mind and I have decided that there is no time like the present to get them off my chest. I must inform all of you of the new plastic car that I have acquired. I will do this by saying what you can translate into the word car and then toss said car onto the ground a number of times until I get you to look at me and recognize it. I really don't mean to seem like a disturbance to the wedding, it's just that I think you'll probably be thoroughly entertained by what I have to offer. Yeah I'm just a toddler but I think that my comedic act will really make you laugh. So while you're all wrapped up in the joy of this holy matrimony I'll be getting carried back and forth from my chair to the corner of the room so that I'm out of earshot. But trust me, what I have to say about my car is going to make your day and all you have to is stop watching the once in a life time thing that is the wedding and direct your attention to me. Until you do that I'm gonna keep talking, so buckle up, it's gonna be a wedding full of my thoughts.

Yours Truly,
The toddler in the 3rd row about to toss the car at the altar.

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